Mental HealthNutritionWeight Loss

You Are Fat, I Thought You Should Know

Last week when presenting at Hou.Sec.Con the first question asked to me was “How do you tell your partner or spouse they are fat and need to lose weight.” I admit to laughing as did most other people in the room.

My response was simple. “You don’t.” 

Everyone Is Different

I know several people that have experienced the weight-loss rollercoaster. Some people have had surgery to drop the pounds, while others have paid for a “medically supervised weight loss” program, where they eat less than 1,000 calories a day and need the doctor to provide missing nutrients. More commonly, many people join a weight loss program or follow a fad.

The Results?

The majority – not surprisingly – fail to keep the weight off long term. The people that have completed the weight loss surgery, while lighter, fail to actually eat better. So, while they might be down significantly in weight and probably no longer dealing with health issues such as heart disease and diabetes, they have failed to take control of their eating habits. For people that join weight loss programs or jump on a weight loss fad, they might push through the program to lose the weight, but as soon as the weight is off, they go back to old habits and the weight returns.

The Fix?

There isn’t a fix. Simply put, people aren’t born obese. People also don’t suddenly wake up obese. Something has happened or is going on in their life that has led them to the lifestyle they are living. So, if someone is obese, it is not your place to tell them. When it comes to lifestyle choices, it is up to the person affected to recognize the problem and commit to change it. 

Historically Speaking

I was probably 14 the first time I was told by a boy that I was fat. The problem? I actually wasn’t heavy back then. As I went through college, my weight crept up and as soon as I started sitting in an office, the weight kept coming. My grandfather told me in my twenties that I was fat. He was almost 90 at the time and thought nothing of his words.

What actually worked for me? I think it was a combination of things. Mainly being frustrated with work. I needed an outlet, so I started going to the gym. My trainer time was my disconnection. My nutrition reconstruction was something I could control. Something I wasn’t getting with my job/career.

As we all know, losing weight is easy. Just ask someone that has never had to lose it!

Keli Hay is a certified personal trainer using her weight loss success to help others.

Read more
NutritionPersonal HealthWeight Loss

Riding a Rollercoaster

I know I am not alone in describing the emotional toll of health and medical diagnoses as a mental rollercoaster. While I know that my weight loss has resulted in no more plantar fasciitis, no more monthly cycle irregularities, and no more weight-related aches, I have always had other issues. Issues that no doctor has ever taken the time to properly diagnose. This past week, I went from a high of happiness knowing that my weight loss reversed another ailment, to a low of being diagnosed with something that I have probably had my entire life.

The Thyroid Problem Symptoms

Since I started puberty at the age of 14, my cycles have been irregular. My weight didn’t really start creeping up until my early to mid twenties. Pretty much every year of my life I have had a women’s wellness exam where I articulated to my doctor that I was irregular with severe cramping and heavy flow. How irregular? I was going 3-8 weeks between cycles with one instance of a 9 month gap and no resulting baby. 

Doctor Timeline

In 2006, a doctor assumed thyroid issues which were confirmed with the TSH blood work. I was prescribed Synthroid and dismissed. While the medicine helped me mentally – because I had been an emotional nightmare – none of my other symptoms changed. I continued to be irregular to the point where we were buying pregnancy tests a few times a year because I was “late” and there might be a chance.

In 2012, my husband and I decided to pursue fertility options while still in Canada. They did the standard blood work – cholesterol, chicken pox, STDs, and other variables that might affect a healthy pregnancy as well as checking if I ovulated every month. The results – I wasn’t ovulating regularly. While I was bleeding, I wasn’t always releasing an egg. My full menstrual history was revisited and the cure was a prescription for Clomid with monthly blood work to see if it triggered ovulation. Eventually they found the right dosage for ovulation, but nothing took. We moved to the states and put babies on hold.

In 2013, after moving to the US, a doctor felt nodules on my thyroid and the referrals began. In under 24 hours, I knew the nodules were not cancerous, so I was to simply continue on Synthroid. My other symptoms continued.

Almost 30 Years Later

In March 2019, I finally got to see an endocrinologist who sent me for a new thyroid ultrasound. The discovery? My nodules were gone! My weight loss and healthier lifestyle made them disappear! I was ecstatic! Could I stop taking Synthroid? Had I completely reversed everything my obesity had created? On Friday, March 29th, the morning before my Bsides Austin presentation, I received the news. I have been diagnosed with Hashimoto’s disease.

Working on a new goal

The Effect on Me

While I know I am not dying, this has hit me hard. I have been struggling to understand why it took into my 40s for a doctor to finally listen, pay attention to my symptoms, and dig further. In addition to always knowing I had something else going on with my body, I have been dealing with pressures – internal and external influences – of having children. Married since 2003, the pressures and assumptions that I would produce children started from the engagement in 2001. Ever since we got married, we always just figured it would happen.

Now that I finally know there is something else going on with me, I am hoping I can move on and continue focusing on me physically. I actually feel like there is some closure, but I think I will always be a little upset. Upset at the possibility that an earlier diagnosis might have made a difference earlier in my life. Upset that no doctor listened. Upset that it took so long to finally know more.

I am now simply hoping that there is nothing else going on. Hoping that cancer and other family illnesses never come in to play. Hoping I can completely let go and move on.

Keli Hay is a certified personal trainer using her weight loss success to help others.

Read more
ActiveNewsPersonal HealthPersonal TrainerPersonal TrainingTrainingWeight Loss

Living and Loving Healthy in Austin

Austin has been a wonderful surprise for me. Having been here six months and now working, it’s starting to feel like home. Yes – I am working, training, and happily busy.
If you are looking for weight loss help or personal training, you will find me in the Domain area of North Austin. Please come on up to visit!

Weight Loss Consultant

Back in December I started working as a weight loss consultant for a major weight loss company and I am really enjoying it. This job occurred because I struck up a conversation with another member at the gym. This new found gym relationship and resulting job, continue to prove the value of interacting with other people at the gym. In my role as a consultant am really enjoying connecting with and helping people take control of their eating habits and lose weight.


Certified Personal Trainer Instructor

In January, I started working with Justin Wecker at PFTA Austin. This opportunity arose because of my passion for instructional design and training as well as Justin needing help. Our collaboration has resulted in a newer, refreshed course that we are proudly debuting in April.
If you have any interest in personal training, sign up for the class at the 50% discounted rate today!


Personal Trainer

This past month, I put the steps in motion to begin personal training out of Gym One. This really excites me. Before committing to a specific gym, I wanted to make sure it was the right place for me. When I joined Gym One at the end of October, it quickly felt like home. Bruce, Austin, and the various trainers at this gym are a family. The egos are low, the squats are deep, and the reps are plentiful.

Ready to lose weight and get moving, then contact me at 512-710-7773 or keli@kelihay.com

Keli Hay is a certified personal trainer using her weight loss success to help others.

Read more
NewsPersonal HealthTrainingWeight Loss

Moving Weirdly in Austin?

Driving out of the Bay area a few weeks back was interesting. We chose to drive from San Mateo to Austin because we have a dog who suffers from travel anxiety and cannot be contained in a kennel. I also happen to love car rides and taking in the scenery.

What to do in Austin

During the drive, I was able to think a lot about what I was going to do in Austin. One thing I have always known is that I want to help people. In my tech career, that meant working on a training team or doing product or service-focused writing. In the world of fitness, it means I want to continue helping people move better.

I Can Help You

Over the past couple of years, I have met and worked with people from mid-twenties to mid-seventies, with goals of losing weight, getting stronger, or simply feeling and moving functionally better. Since moving here, many people have asked me what type of client I am looking for. I don’t have a simple answer. Similar to my workouts, I want a variety of clients. If you want to…

  • get moving and lose weight, I can help you
  • challenge yourself with weight lifting goals, I can help you
  • undo pain and discomfort from commuting or office work, I can help you.

If you are pregnant, wanting to become fit before becoming pregnant, or dealing with post-pregnancy effects, I can help you.

Who the Heck is Keli Hay?

My blog posts hit on a lot about me. In particular, if you are considering a personal trainer, please read Finding and Working with a Personal Trainer. This was scripted based on my own experience working with a trainer.

Keli Hay is a certified personal trainer using her weight loss success to help others.

Read more